Take the long way round

Today I was thinking (surprising I know) about all of the dreams, hopes, goals, and random things that generally make me really very happy.  I love being a mother, a wife, and I love being home with my children. I also love a really good scenic route, where the roads twist and wind and suddenly you are faced with impossible beauty. I love taking life slowly, getting lost, and falling down. I love mistakes and socks. I love to learn and I adore a fantastic challenge. Really I often find myself struggling to complete something (a paper for school, a dress, a painting, a complicated recipe, a story, crochets, and so on), I ask myself out loud, "Why have I done this again!" But I am smiling because I know I can do it. I try to teach my children that anything worth having takes hard work and lots of mistakes.

I love mistakes and mishaps. That moment when you know how to fix the problem and do it better next time is the best feeling in the world. Awesome. I am not perfect and between you and me I do not want to be either. Perfection is boring. I am not saying not to be great at something. That is not the case. What I mean is never stop trying to be better because once you (my own belief only) think you cannot get any better you stagnate. I never want to stop growing as a person. So hey I invite you to critic me (nicely). I know that my grammar needs improvement. I know that I can be quirky and messy and slightly to the left. All of those things are pieces of me.

Sometimes I worry a lot more than necessary. I bite my lower lib and consider the path I have taken. From my current view point it looks long and there is a few twists and turns ahead that make my heart beat faster. What is around the bend? Who am I going to be? I am I too old to  . . .? Sometimes it feels more like panic and it can be extremely destructive. Where is my crystal ball? What are the mysteries waiting for me?

Most of these questions have no right or wrong answer. Right now I am scheduled to graduate college with a Bachelors Degree in English in 2018. It feels like forever and ever. Really I get to teach my children what to expect out of college. That it is never too late to chase a dream or to change a dream or take a chance and to believe in themselves. They see me struggle, but they see me succeed too. I hope that when they are adults facing the world they take the road less traveled. They always know that they are worth it, and deserve to be happy.

As you know all know I am a writer. That is what makes me the happiest. My heart beats lyrics, and I bleed ink. Okay not really but when I write I feel accomplished. I am proud and at peace. I have known that I have wanted to be a writer since I was eight. But through a series of very unfortunate events I had no confidence in my ability. I did not know my own worth. That is really why I chose English as a degree to help me improve, to help me build my confidence. So when the time comes I will take a leap of faith and finally learn to fly. Yes, I know that I can be a writer without education. For me it is a milestone that I want to place on my road, A sign that says, "Oh, Yes. I can."

Do you know what makes you happy? That little whisper at the center of your heart. Yes, that one. Be happy my friend. Make mistakes, take a chance and follow your dreams. Yes, you can. You can do anything you want to do. You are amazing and worth it.

I think we need a song

I love this song. It makes me happy.

Oh be doo, Okay, it is still my favorite movie.

This is my all time favorite track, song, music. It speaks to me.

 

 

I hope that your day is filled with inspiration, love, and laughter. Be well my friend.

 

Grateful Friday

Well I just like to randomly name the days of the week with great ideas which I tend to get sidetracked and forget to continue posting said ideas on the days of the week. Why, well I get busy, sidetracked, lazy, and or lose interest. Recipe Tuesday, I totally love, should make a comeback. I do cook everyday but I do not always make new interesting things. Maybe it should not matter. I declare the resurrection of Recipe Tuesdays, maybe. We will see. Poetry Thursdays, how I love those sweet days, I have piled my plate so high full of plans and details it is sometimes hard to be extra creative, plus look something shiny. . .

What I learned Sundays. I did not stop learning and I love what I learned Sunday. A whole week of interesting things and the not so interesting things that I learned throughout the week posted on Sunday. Then you learn a few things about me in the details, I watch too much T.V. I like to find out what happens before I get to the end. I like spoilers. I am a geek, I love my children, I love my husband, and I love our garden. Then there is that whole college thing, sometimes I love college classes and sometimes I find it a tedious waste of time. I just want to be educated on the things I want to be educated about. What? Good news is that I am nearly finished with my general requirements (i.e. mildly interesting classes colleges make you take for the sake of knowledge or money). I will soon be able to start on my literature classes. You just learned that I like to get all the uninteresting classes out of the way, or that I am just going straight down my list of academic requirements. Either could be true.     

Meal plan Mondays. Actually I lost interest in this one because sometimes in the middle of the week I ask myself what I was thinking and make a off menu change. Well this happens a lot! I am sure I have named other days but I have forgotten so they do not get a mention. I think sometimes in an effort to stay focused I name things, sometimes I love an idea and want to keep it up, and sometimes I am just random.

So back to the title of the post Grateful Fridays. Being Grateful Cultivates Joy. I read that today and it gave me pause. If being grateful cultivates joy maybe it is time for me to be more grateful in order to becomes more joyous. Maybe the key to conquering the winter blues is simply to be grateful for the details. Although to be honest right now the boys are fighting and crying and not being happy. Sometimes it is hard to be joyous but I am ever so grateful to have those boys in my life. Funny story when I was a teenager I wrote in a journal. For some reason I was always thanking God for boys. So God repaid the favor with a house full of boys. True story.

I am grateful to my husband. He is wonderful and is my missing puzzle piece. I am so happy that he chose me and still loves me. He encourages me to be better and points out my flaws when necessary (I love it because I can get wrapped up in myself and frankly sometimes I need to be reminded that I can be better). He is there when I need him. I am so grateful that he is mine.

We recently got some new puppies. They are cuddly and always want to be near me. Considering my husband seems to be an animal whisperer I am grateful for their warm little bodies in my lap and next to me. It helps that they are 7 and 5 pounds and they will not outgrow me.

I am grateful for my health and the health of our family. I am grateful that we are able to support the local farmers around us. I am grateful that we can feed the children a healthy diet.

I am grateful for family time. I am grateful that I get the privilege to stay home with my children, and I get to home school them. I am grateful to have a house, and electricity. I am grateful to live in Texas for such a long period of time (at least five years). I am also very thankful for you my friends. Thank you for reading, thank you for your support. Thank you for being you.

I am happy and I am joyous.

 

I hope that you are able to find the joy today and that it is filled with love and laughter. Be well my Friends